May I Have Your Shopper Serial Number?

I’m sorry, but when did the process of buying an item turn into a question and answer session? Within the last week, as I’ve purchased things, it’s been:

  • Borders: “What’s your ZIP Code?”
  • Godiva: “May I have your phone number?”
  • Radio Shack: “Can I have your ZIP Code?

And let’s not forget the blue-shirted brigands at Best Buy, who not only ask you your phone number, they then use that information to drill down amongst the members of the household to find your name — all whilst three of them tag-team you, trying to convince you to buy the stupid extended warranty at a full 16% of the purchase price! (Oh, how I loathe Best Buy. Stay far away from them. Use Amazon. Use Froogle. Use… anything else.)

I realize this isn’t a particularly original gripe, just as I realize that the questions will probably fade away as we all start using plastic and become eminently more traceable. I just wish that the shopping experience could start to suck a little less — or, better, that I’d learn I probably don’t need to buy it in the first place.

5 Responses to “May I Have Your Shopper Serial Number?”

  1. Joel Says:

    When they try that at Best Buy with me, I tell ’em “no” in simple but no uncertain terms, and they continue with the transaction. Of course, if I’m only buying a DVD off their “$5.99 or less” rack, maybe they don’t want me as a repeat customer…but didn’t you learn this in D.A.R.E. class? Just say No! Works on drug dealers, Morrocan rug dealers, register drones, and friends who try to get you to drink beer at a birthday party.

  2. jsp Says:

    Oh I fully agree. I usually weigh whether to just say no or to be difficult. For the record, my responses were:
    Borders: “Nope.”
    Godiva: “Nope.”
    Radio Shack: “2048”. Then, when he looked at me funny: “In Australia, of course.”
    Best Buy: “Get me your manager.”

    But I think my new policy will be to just lie. I used to know a guy who would even make up Social Security Numbers. I don’t know if I’d go that far, but really, like I give a shit about their demographics.

    Also, as far as Moroccan rug dealers go, I found it more to be “Just Say No… over and over again.”

  3. awarren Says:

    I once got into an argument with a Best Buy register drone over purhasing the extended warranty on a $11.99 sony universal remote control. Why should I have to defend myself against the pleading “yeah, but what if you drop it?” pressure just in order to buy something from them? Why aren’t they happy that I’m buying something? Then maybe when they follow up with their “would you like a subscription to sports illustrated?” I might not have a major cardiac in their store. I f***ing hate Best Buy. (Next time I’m going you know I’ll bring a deck of $2 bills)…

  4. meq Says:

    those were the days…

  5. jsp Says:

    awarren: What’s with the stars? You can say you ‘fucking’ hate Best Buy. This ain’t a kid-friendly site. Screw the little bastards! (Also, for those who don’t know, the $2 bill line refers to more Best Buy idiocy.)

    meq: Don’t I know it. Nowadays I’m thinking 2037 sounds better…

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