As I was waiting for Seinfeld to start last evening, I flipped around to see what else was on (my 4 total channels.) I caught the start of a WOI 5 news cast reporting that PeTA had been rejected in its efforts to run a billboard in Cedar Rapids and Des Moines.

The billboard (PDF) draws a direct line from pork consumption to impotence. The accompanying copy includes such gems as “with pork out of the grocery bag, maybe you can get porkin'” and “this little piggy…makes it harder for your wiener to get jiggy.” And then there’s this:

Slimmer, sexy vegetarians also have the upper hand when it comes to stamina and increased blood flow to those oh-so-vital organs. And let’s face it–a man who stuffs his belly full of dead pigs in the kitchen only to deliver dead wood in the bedroom becomes a big bore.

I know they’re crazy. But the concept haunted me all the way to Hy-Vee tonight…where I bought turkey dogs.

Update [14:15]: They’re actually not so bad. Who knew?

This entry was posted on Wednesday, November 20th, 2002 at 2:38 am and is filed under Miscellany.. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.