Thank G-d for Debbie
No sooner had
Her banter was less than original (“How tall are you?”) but she made up for it with a drunken intensity. She told me she was 30, had 2 kids, and never got out but tonight she had a sitter at her place, which was just a little bit up the road. I quickly became aware that her body was pressing against mine over a massive surface area.
Looking down to see how I might escape the encroaching blob, I noticed her shirt had a large circular stain on her right breast. “Beer,” she said. I couldn’t think of anything to say, so I went with: “That’s a waste of good beer.” She stared at me in a way that conveyed I had spoken words of such imponderable importance that even devoting that tiny bit of brainpower necessary to blink was an insult to my wisdom.
Then she told me I didn’t know sex until I’d had it with an older woman.
Ewwwwwww.
Fortunately, it was just after this that
Bless her.